Here are a few bro tips for being a well-rounded, pick-up player and keys to having fun while getting some good burn. I hope to come off somewhat comedic but these should all be considered when you get on the hardwood.
Bro Tip #1: Don't be the ultra-competitive douche.
We get it, you're the Type-A, Ari Gold type but you don't need to yell, curse or get upset at your teammates. It's a pick-up game, not Game 7 of the NBA Finals or the Final Four. We're just out there trying to get some exercise and have some fun, not work on putting in a new offense for the next time the Miami Heat come to town.
And along those lines, we don't need a coach on the floor. You should be happy that I had your back and set a pick for you, don't get pissed when I popped and you wanted me to roll to the bucket.
Bro Tip #2: The least you can do is try.
This is sort of the antithesis of #1 but someone who is barely going through the motions can effect the game just as much (if not more) than someone who's trying too hard. Really, we should all be able to expect everyone in the game to put forth an honest effort. That isn't too much to ask. Don't cherry-pick and get back on D. Scoring on the "run out" constantly is such a cop out. Incidentally, there's always that guy who's super talented or super tall and all he does is camp at the three point line. Don't be soft.
Not trying might also correlate to being an ultra competitive douche. Often times, I've seen guys who are clearly very competitive dudes get upset when things aren't going their way and they pout and give up on the game or get so frustrated with their teammates who "aren't good enough" they quit on the team. Almost sounds like Brandon Jennings...zing.
Bro Tip #3: Don't be a ball-hog and/or chucker.
I'm not asking my pick-up team to run an effective Princeton offense but let's move the damn ball around a bit. It's pretty awful when there's that one guy who dribbles the air out of the ball and then throws up a shot. If they are going in at a decent clip it helps, but is still annoying for the other four guys on the squad.
Bro Tip #4: Play within yourself.
This is basically the essence of being a decent basketball player at any level of ability or competition. Don't try to do to much. If you don't have the ability to carry the team, don't take all the shots. If you can't create your own shot, you have to outwork your man and get rebounds, work for second chance points or go be a statue in the corner and bang threes when the ball is thrown your way. Do what you can. If you can't bring the ball up the floor, give it to someone who can and don't turn it over in the process. If you can't dunk, don't dunk, etc.
On that note, however, no one likes the guy that can't do anything but hustle his ass off and play incredible defense. This is basketball, not football. Now I sound like the ultra-competitive douche. Oh well.
Bro Tip #5: Don't make excuses.
So you missed a cupcake layup or turned the ball over bringing it up the court. We don't need to hear about how you just lifted and you feel goofy. Excuses are like b-holes, everyone's got one. Just go get 'em next time. I'd say the guy that calls too many fouls should listen to this as well. You missed the shot, bro. There might have been some contact but man up.
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